March was the beginning of new things…new job, new flat, a year older.
As February was winding down, so was my old life. I was no longer a student, and my Starbucks Barista life was coming to a close. I gave my notice at Starbucks, was completing paperwork for my new job as PA to the Chief Executive of a charity here in Aberdeen, and my flatmate was strongly urging me to find another place to live because she wanted to be on her own again.
Change is good sometimes but I felt like I was being hit with changes from all sides. I really wanted to go through one change at a time, but no, I had to do them all at the same time.
Good did come out of it. I visited 9 properties in 2 days before finding the one I liked. My application was accepted with no problems, I wonder if they actually called my references. I was able to move in very quickly–I basically had to tell them when I wanted to move in.
On Monday, the 9th, not only was it my birthday, but also the day I started my new job, then that Saturday I moved into my new flat.
All was good. You’d think I’d be totally excited…I was scared out of my mind. What if the job didn’t work out? Would I be able to go back to Starbucks? I couldn’t do that. What about the fact I’ve just moved into a new flat and if the job doesn’t work out? What if?
My ‘focus’ word for March was Depend. If I was living up to the ‘focus’ word from February, I was trusting God in everything…but was I allowing myself to really depend on God? I was experiencing new things; I was asking God to guide me. And, what I discovered was that I needed to depend on Him, really depend on Him.
For me, depend is not the same as trust. Trust is to hope; to place one’s confidence in. Depend is to rest confidently; to rely on; to be certain.
All I could do was to seek support through scripture and prayer.
I found: (all passages are in NLT)
Psalm 28:7 “The Lord is my strength, my shield from every danger. I trust in him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.”
Psalm 33:4 “For the word of the Lord hold true, and everything he does is worthy of our trust.” WOW this one really convicted me…who can argue this one away…why would I not trust and depend on the Lord.
Psalm 37:18-19 “Day by day the Lord takes care of the innocent…They will survive through hard times even in famine they will have more than enough.” I love this one…they will survive! This is an amazing promise to us during these difficult times.
Psalm 121 “I look up to the mountains-does my help come from there? My help comes from the Lord, who made the heavens and the earth! he will not let you stumble and fall; the one who watches over you will not sleep. Indeed, he who watches over Israel never tires and never sleeps. The Lord himself watches over you! The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade. The sun will not hurt you by day, nor the moon at night. The Lord keeps you from all evil and preserves your life. The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever.” I love this passage…the thought that the Lord never sleeps…He watches over us. He’s our protective shade…like a shield, protects us from the heat, from the cold, from evil.
These passages show what God does for us if we allow Him room to care for us. I think that’s the trick…letting God have the room in our lives to take over. Depending on something and someone is hard to do. Letting go of control is hard, but knowing what we know of God, don’t you think we would be better off with Him taking over than if we did it all ourselves with our own feeble abilities? Lamenations 3:25 says “The Lord is wonderfully good to those who wait for Him and seek Him.”
Who wouldn’t want the Lord to be wonderfully good to them? Is it so hard to let God in and just depend on Him? After all that I’ve experienced, I like knowing that God is in control and that He cares so much for me that He will protect me, provide for me and be wonderfully good to me.
What about you? Are you able to let God in to take control? Are you able to depend on Him?
Next time: Hope